Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Be known, float.

Naked in an infinitely dark tank filled with 10 inches of supersaturated salt water, I am floating. No I'm serious, I really am. The rare joy of knowing quiet enters my life as I become unable to distinguish the difference between having my eyes open or closed. Entirely engulfed in blackness, my mind sort of freaks out and suddenly leaps from one thing to the next, which is comical to watch. I am actually working to turn my mind away from considering that the tank might run out of oxygen. This fear prompts a hilarious self dialogue for sure. It is reminiscent of being afraid to climb above a clip except that this fear is much less rational. Eventually though, things really slow down. They slow way down. My thoughts focus on one act: my breath. Hitting this point, my body temperature tangles with the matching water temperature and brings my motionless body towards a comfortable numbness. I am not sure if I am moving through the water or at rest. I am entirely still. Then, I breath. As I inhale, my body moves further above the surface and upon exhale I come back. When my eyes are open, I see the exact same images as when they are closed. It's sort of like when you press your thumb against your closed eye, expect that this time those yellow sense images are painting my thoughts on a black canvas. Yet since I am having thoughts about these thoughts, they seem more like objects to reflect upon than visual explosions emanating from my mind. So I dive into the experience. As clouds can become anything with enough imagination, I begin to experiment with these images by seeing them as parts of my body, ideas for prayer, and reminders of those individuals in my life that directly influence my thankfulness.

This was the first waking hour of life that I've spent being motionless. I am still experiencing this unique gift, so I'm not sure how long this affect will last, but at the risk of sounding like a new age crystal wearing hippie, I must admit that I have a lifted spirit and blissful calm. Thank you Adam for this amazing gift. Necessity has a strange way of working itself into my life.